Sunday, May 22, 2011

Rapture-esque: An Open Letter to the Media

Just watching the "post rapture" news and, frankly, bemused at the lack of acknowledgement by the media that 99% of Christians knew this guy was full of it. Shaking my head. So, apparently, some news reporters are saying "most Christians" believed yesterday was the rapture??? Really. So, here's my open letter to the media:

Dear Talking Bubble-Heads:

So, I see you're reporting that "most Christians" thought May 21, 2011 was some sort of "rapture" day. Um, not so, For the record (and I looked, researched and asked), I don't know about any Christians (beyond some tiny fringe group of followers of Harold Camping) that bought in. I know this kills you (take deep breaths. It'll be okay), but Christians are a savvy bunch. We read. Our belief system is BASED on the Bible so since the Bible says NO MAN will know the date of the rapture, we pretty much figured out that NO MAN can predict this date. Wanna peek? Here you go:

Matthew 24:36 No one kn
ows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.

Want further assurance that 99% of Christians KNEW Harold Camping has a few screws loose?

Here's another couple of widely know verses:

Mark 13:32 No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.

Acts 1:7 He said to them: "It is not for you to know the times or dates the Father has set by his own authority."

So, sorry media folks. "Most Christians" were not duped. Of course the media doesn't want to admit that - it's much more fun to pretend that all Christians are a bunch of rubes who follow any hair-brained scheme - as long as it's about "Jesus." See, it's painfully obvious you're not so big on God, Christianity and Jesus. Anything that you think might make God look bad? You're all over it (and, admittedly, sometimes we Christians make it easy for you to poke us with a stick). But on this one, guys, you shot and you missed. Nice try, though.

Don't worry, I'm sure you're already on the hunt for some other ridiculous headliner on those wacky people who have the unmitigated gall to believe in another god besides the media god (YOURSELVES), that you want us all to worship. Good luck with all that.

Meanwhile, the Christians - well, we sit and giggle at YOU. We're used to your ignorance about us and the true God - and we really don't care. He rules - literally. And yes, we're certain the rapture will come, someday. We're pretty psyched about that - and you're welcome to join us, by the way.

Until then, I guess we'll both just have to tolerate one another.

Sorry to have taken so much of your time. I'm done, here. Feel free to go back to reporting the real news - like Kim Kardashian sound bytes, Lindsay Lohan's court antics or Diddy's latest name change. Your depth, by the way? Breathtaking.

Party on, Wayne. Party on, Garth. :)

~ Erin Farrell

PS: Props to some writers for actually TRYING to be reasonable. My hat, were I wearing one (it was raptured, yesterday, along with thousands of missing socks) is off to you. Check out this article: